,no? NONONO NO NO NO NO!!!

Here’s something I hate. Sentences ended with “,no?”. It occurs mostly in writing, mostly in e-writing, on the stupid fucking internet.

“Dark Knight was a great movie, no?”
“Pizza Hut is greasy, no?”
“Being punched in the face is totally rad, no?”

Here’s what “,no?” translates to: “amirite?!?”

Fucking Stop It.

Grow some balls and make a fucking statement, or rewrite your sentence so that it’s an actual goddamn question.

“Dark Knight was a great movie.”
“Pizza Hut is greasy.”
“Being punched in the face is totally rad.”

“Did you think the Dark Knight was a great movie?”
“How do you feel about the greasy-ness of Pizza Hut pizza?”
“I used to think that being punched in the face was pretty rad, but I’m having second thoughts; what is your position, apropos a punch in the face?”

“,no?” is lazy fucking writing, and every time I read it, I feel like I’m being insulted personally. It is simultaneously the mark of a will too weak, too desperate for approval to make a clear, and firm statement, while at the same time too disinterested in the eyes and minds of the sensitive reader to write AN ACTUAL BEARFUCKING QUESTION!

I imagine, in my mind, that anyone who ends a sentence with “,no?” sounds exactly like Alyson Hannigan’s flutist character from American Pie.

Of course, it should be pointed out that the “,no?” ending serves a similar function to the Canadian, “,eh?”. However, “,eh?” has a long cultural history in this great nation, and is a word exactly suited to its purpose. “No” is already a word. It already means NO. By using “no” in the place of “eh?”, one essentially says, “I’VE JUST NEGATED MY WHOLE STATEMENT IN THE DESPERATE HOPES THAT YOU WILL REAFFIRM IT!”

Stop. Stop it you jelly-spined crybabies.